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Start with one eye-bursting migraine and four hours of sleep.

Agitate at ticket counter with mysteriously cancelled reservation.

Add excessively perfumed seatmate, half a dozen "precocious" children under the age of 6, two adolescent boys engaged in a farting contest, and a guy whose cell phone plays (without irony) "Ode to Joy" every 15 minutes.

Pack into Amtrak car with a faulty bathroom that smells like the tiger cage at the zoo.

Jostle for 6.5 hours.


Overheard on the train:

"It involves a napkin...and pepper!"
"I can imagine!"

"Is that book good?"
"Yeah, it's a typical Grisham!"

(Six-year-old girl to her mother) "But I want to get off this train now! You got that, you knucklehead?"

Replies: 3 Confessions

As we say at our house, Fuck that train.
Have you recovered?

elavil @ 08/02/2003 09:40 AM CST

oh sweetie. well, you made it? and it doesn't sound that different than riding the el. ok, trips on the el are over faster.


shechemist @ 08/02/2003 05:23 PM CST

Perhaps the mother was a Stooge?

jima @ 08/02/2003 05:33 PM CST

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