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What if a handful of big-city mayors followed Gavin Newsom's courageous lead? Could Chicago be the next city to issue same-sex marriage licenses? Man, I hope so. I would spend my lunch hours at City Hall, showering the beloveds with rose petals.

Da Mare summed it up at a press conference yesterday:

"A lot of people are opposed to it. So be it," the mayor said. "But again, you have to point out the strength of that community -- they're doctors, they're lawyers, they're journalists, they're politicians, they're someone's son or daughter, they're someone's mother or father.

"They're parents, and I have been with them. They've adopted children. They have wonderful children. To me, we have to understand this is part and parcel of our families and our extended families."

Daley said "we have to understand" what the gay couples have been saying: "They love each other, just as much as anyone else. They believe that the benefits they don't have, they should have. And so I have a very open mind on it."

So who gives a rat's ass if President Bush is "troubled" by same-sex marriage? If he wants to "protect marriage" so damn badly, why not outlaw divorce and adultery? (That would put at least half the GOP behind bars, including Bush's brother Neil, who got herpes from a Thai prostitute.) Why not eliminate the quicky Vegas wedding, which gave Britney Spears a fully legal marriage -- and divorce -- in just two days? Why single out (no pun intended) a group of hardworking, tax-paying citizens by crafting a Constitutional amendment making them permanent second-class citizens?

Well, because these "family values" people are a bunch of goddamn hypocrites, of course, wrapping their bigotry in morality like a poisoned date wound in juicy bacon, held together with the frill-pick of fear. Stop eating these appetizers of doom, people! Because the main course will surely kill you!*


*I know. It's early. I didn't sleep well.

Replies: 6 Confessions

Oh, my god. The frill-pick of fear! That's the best thing I've heard all week. Now my brain is going to be silently chanting that phrase to itself for the rest of the day. I can't decide whether I want it to be the title of a Truman Capote novel or a Saturday morning cartoon show.

Partly Dave @ 02/19/2004 07:25 AM CST

It's that "family values" thing that keeps catching me up. How can it be legal to adopt children but NOT legal to get married?

elavil @ 02/19/2004 08:37 AM CST

as usual, very well said! i love how the blog-o-sphere is now lovin' our mayor :) his words are moving all over the place pretty quickly.

miss ellen @ 02/19/2004 03:56 PM CST

Fingers crossed, triple-crossed, actually, out here.

Frill-pick of Fear is, I think, going to be my new superhero alias. I keep wanting to say frill-prick, but I guess that's something different.

The dj who started his 6pm show onKALX has been doing a "Let's Get Married" marathon for the past six songs. Yay.

Jessica @ 02/19/2004 08:20 PM CST

Looks like NM's Sandoval County is the next place to allow same-sex marriages. Hooray!

jima @ 02/20/2004 02:14 PM CST

The ACLU has put together a warm and fuzzy fax/email template, so quick! Fax your Senators and Representatives!

Jessica @ 02/27/2004 11:20 AM CST

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