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So, last Friday, I had to have a little, uh, procedure. I was having some "issues" that required a visit to a gastrointestinal specialist who decided a colonoscopy was in order. I'll spare you the details of AssCam 3000, mostly because I don't really remember anything. The only real reason any of this is worth noting (to me, anyway) is because I had an IV stuck in my hand. (Those of you who have known me for a while know I had a little problem with needles since childhood, which required a year of therapeutic reconditioning with an anxiety specialist until I could have basic medical care without panic attacks.)

Unfortunately, I could not bring my breathing coach with me for the colonoscopy, so I had to test all these relaxation and focusing exercises on my own for the first time. And I'll be damned -- they worked! Despite my anxiety about the needle and about the procedure in general (as well as having had no food for 36 hours prior, which made me a little edgy), I managed to have the IV inserted without panicking or fainting or even breaking a sweat. As soon as the nurse plugged in the sedative drip, I was wandering through a field of mental daisies, oblivious to the goings-on in my nether regions. And whatever Dr. G was looking for wasn't there, so my bill of health is still sparkly clean.

So that's all I really wanted to talk about -- I was kind of giggly with pride over the needle thing all weekend, and I just wanted to share. I'm not Katie Couric, so I won't share the pictures (Jim got to see them, though, as he was propping up my still-druggy head while the doctor explained the results. You know it's for real when your partner can see full-color photos of your innards and still find you desirable).

Replies: 3 Confessions

What a drag it is getting old. Glad to hear your colon is clean and pure.

eighmie @ 05/09/2005 11:34 AM CST

In high school, I lost weight my senior year so that I would be too thin to give blood. I was just too freaked out by the needle. As a bonus, I weighed 95 lbs. at graduation.

Ann V @ 05/09/2005 03:54 PM CST

Wow, that's so great, that the techniques worked! All that work was worth it. Well done! You've done marvelously.

Phyl @ 05/12/2005 06:02 PM CST

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