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Condom ads stir new battle in US culture wars


"Condoms are the line in the sand," said Randy Sharp of the American Family Association (AFA), which is behind a mass e-mail campaign to safeguard one of television's last taboos.

Ew! Sandy condoms! Abrasion! Ew!

Sickened by an on-screen barrage of sexy images and impotence drug commercials, 'family values' activists leapt into action following reports a major condom manufacturer was eyeing prime-time advertising slots.

...instead of just, you know, turning off the TV. I dig AFP's use of scare quotes, though -- part of the subtle French disdain wafting through the article.

"We oppose condom ads because they promote promiscuity," said Sharp.

"The American Family Association has always leaned toward traditional family values that sex should be kept within the marriage bed."

And no married people would ever use condoms, right? [looks around nervously]

You know what else promotes promiscuity? White-sale ads! All those clean sheets tucked crisply into hospital corners, beckoning our precious youth to take to their beds -- and we all know what happens in beds! Filth! Let's outlaw beds! Except for marriage beds, of course. Only when you have sanctified your union before the Lord God Almighty will you be allowed to have a bed. All others shall sleep standing up, like the lambs in the meadow, innocent and vertical and woolly.

Michael McGee, vice president of the Planned Parenthood Federation of America said : "the more we can normalize conversations about healthy sexuality and safer sex, the better off we are as a society."

While condom manufacturers should recognize decency standards, it would be wrong to confine advertising to a purely public health style message, he said.

"I do think it is appropriate to have messages in the family hour as long as it is with the recognition of who's watching and its appropriate."

"If they can use sexy images to sell sneakers and soft drinks, it certainly makes sense for them to use that when they are selling condoms," McGee said.

And, of course, here come the godless, sexy liberals with all their "logic" and "reason." When will they learn that you can't go around making sense all the time? Not in today's America!

Replies: 1 Confession

I'm all for banning condom commercials, as long as we can also ban boner drug commercials too. No more grinning golfer dude, no more guy with horns. And please, no more of that anti-toe fungus commercial with the bacteria- thing opening up a toenail! That's so damned gross!

Okay, I'm done now. Night night.

Reverend H.L. Spork @ 06/02/2005 12:09 AM CST

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