Back to main menu :: [Prev] we vishnu a hare krishna [Next]

The Trib publishes yet another silly letter from someone who has drunk Bill O'Reilly's crazy eggnog and believes Christmas is under attack by "so-called civil liberties groups." Where the hell do they find these people? I've heard the phrase "happy holidays" used in place of specific holiday-related well-wishing my entire life (I'm almost 36). It's hardly a new trend. In fact, it used to be considered completely harmless and friendly. Is their faith so weak that they must have their religion validated by every store clerk and sales banner lest they plunge into the fires of eternal damnation and sex toys?

For the last time: There is no "war against Christmas." (Well, except for James Wolcott.)

Now, a war against Christmas music -- that's something I could totally get behind! I might even be persuaded to take up arms.

Replies: 4 Confessions

Forget Xmas, how about all these people saying "goodbye" all year round? Time was, folks said "GOD BE WITH YOU" to each other but these days everything's gotta be abbreviated, bastardized, and SECULARIZED.

drench @ 12/02/2005 06:00 PM CST

Amazing. If Bill O'Reilly stood on the Belmont El platform and said this stuff, he'd get three hots (well, maybe lukewarms) and a cot at ISPI (Illinois State Psychiatric Institute). But he says it on Fox and everybody makes Boomhauer noises and suddenly there's a secular humanist conspiracy to undermine capitalist theocratic democracy and WAL-MART IS ON THE SIDE OF SATAN. You couldn't make this stuff up.

elavil @ 12/04/2005 06:31 PM CST

At my bookstore, I'm in charge of programming the overhead music. right after Thanksgiving, the order come in: all holday music from now on. Of course, "holiday music" translates into "Xmas music." Since my options were limited by the program, I did my best, throwing in some Dr. Demento in with the "Christ is born" stuff, but most importantly, I larded the system with over 40 CDs just so my co-workers wouldn't have to hear the same dozen or so albums every 45 minutes.

Well, now I'm down to 39 CDs. It was strongly hinted that if I did not remove Burl Ives from the overhead mix, my nads would be roasting on an open fire. No argument here.

As for the holiday/Xmas controversy... pul-eeze. This is the most manufactured, overrated poo I've heard in months; 99.9 percent of Americans don't give a rat's ass about this. Torn over "Happy holidays" vs. "Merry Christmas?" Say, "Have a good day/evening/weekend" instead. Fuck the holidays, all of them. Except July 4th. And maybe Arbor Day.

Reverend H.L. Spork @ 12/08/2005 12:39 PM CST

And Halloween!

Reverend Agnes Lionel @ 12/13/2005 10:47 AM CST

Add A New Comment

Name (required)

E-Mail (required)

Homepage (optional)

Remember personal info?