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O'Reilly, again (just one more post about this, then I'll stop. I swear on the Baby Jesus):

I am not going to let oppressive, totalitarian, anti-Christian forces in this country diminish and denigrate the holiday and the celebration. I am not going to let it happen. I'm gonna use all the power that I have on radio and television to bring horror into the world of people who are trying to do that. And we have succeeded. You know we've succeeded. They are on the run in corporations, in the media, everywhere. They are on the run, because I will put their face and their name on television, and I will talk about them on the radio if they do it. There is no reason on this earth that all of us cannot celebrate a public holiday devoted to generosity, peace, and love together. There is no reason on the earth that we can't do that. So we are going to do it. And anyone who tries to stop us from doing it is gonna face me.

This all reminds me of one night in the late 80s, when I was watching the dinner-hour news with my folks. Detroit's leading local anchorman, Bill Bonds -- our real-live Kent Brockman with the orange skin and impressive toupee and unpredictable outbursts -- challenged the city's mayor to a boxing match. Live. On the news. Drunk out of his mind. He actually used the phrase "just you and me, big daddy"!

The next day Bonds, who was such a towering figure in Detroit that the Free Press TV critic took to calling him "News Christ," was unceremoniously shipped off to rehab for a month. His was an embryonic version of the nutty blowhard shitck that O'Reilly has patented -- the faux-libertarian millionaire who "cares" about the little guy, takes everything personally, and imagines enemies in every corner. I just keep wondering when someone's going to stage the long-overdue intervention on Falafel Boy and send him to a nice retreat where they can get him off the goofballs and slap the crazy out of him. Because his every sneer is obviously a cry for help.

Replies: 4 Confessions

"There is no reason on this earth that all of us cannot celebrate a public holiday devoted to generosity, peace, and love together. There is no reason on the earth that we can't do that. So we are going to do it. And anyone who tries to stop us from doing it is gonna face me."

So, celebrate love, OR ELSE? Well, when he puts it that way, who wouldn't want to join in?

ChgoRed @ 12/08/2005 05:51 AM CST


"Love your neighbor, or I'll fucking kill you."

I'm pretty sure that's in the Bible.

Amy C @ 12/08/2005 09:47 AM CST


Please don't stop. Oh pretty please!

Stephanie R @ 12/08/2005 10:46 AM CST


Jesus loves the Bill O'Reily's
All the Bill O'reilly's in the world
Red and Yellow, Black and white
Blow them up with Dynamite
Jesus loves the Bill O' Reilly's of the world.

eighmie @ 12/13/2005 11:34 PM CST


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